I think it started all because of last night. We went to the Ambassador with Keeweenaw Pride and he was hitting on some dudes in the group. I was just trying to cover my ass the whole night, more or less (not literally, because gays aren't interested in females!!) So, there I sat, out of the conversation, alone. Waiting for us to leave. He didn't even ride in the same car as I did. :-( I just felt abandoned.
So today, I didn't have a chance to talk to him, because I ate lunch with my Unit Operations group (UO) and we didn't see Mike and Josh in the cafeteria. Then my UO group went back to the lab and then to the library.
I had to leave because I had a meeting to conduct tonight (as VP of the Weight-lifting Club, I had to fill in for the absent President). I wasn't prepared for that at all. I didn't even have an outline and I didn't have the room reserved, so i was really feeling shitty about myself.
Well, after the meeting I was walking back to McNair (my dorm) and the dude I was walking with (the Treasurer of THWC--Tri-Hall Weight Club) saw one of his friends and stopped in the room. I followed, figuring anything was better than what I was going to do to myself later.
Right off the bat, the conversation jumped to lack of sex and females at Tech. I just said it was really hard being away from the man I care about and I was trying to be loyal. The guys laughed. I guess they got the same impression that everyone seems to get about me: I'm a whore.
Then Treasurer dude left cause he had HW to do or something like that. I just sat there for a while and then another dude walked in who also lives in McNair. After we were talking a bit, I suggested we go to our dorm. We walked back and talked about the Packers. It was all too depressing.
I was sick of talking so I went to Josh and Mike's room. I sat and watched Josh play Final Fantasy VII. It was nice to just watch and not have to talk. I was in such internal pain that I didn't want to communicate to the outside world.
I remember asking where Mike was and Josh told me that he was out with some guy. I felt crappy. I couldn't believe how down I got. I still am down, but it's a little better now. I feel like I'm writing a novel because I just don't want to stop venting. So if you are still reading this, I'm impressed. You must be as bored as I or you just can't pull yourself away from the green power...
Next thing I remember is Josh saying that I should go to bed in my room. I had apparently fallen asleep in the chair while I had been watching him play. He told me to go to my room because he had been programming for an hour and thought that I would be more comfy if I was in a bed.
Mike wasn't home by the time I left the room (about 1:30am). That's really late for Mike to be awake, because he usually goes to bed about Midnight or so.
Carisa
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