I told myself I'm not going to cry, but I'm not sure of it until the end of the night to see if I could make my promise to myself or not. I miss him, but I should celebrate his life, not his absense.

In case you don't already know, I'm talking about Googie. My baby. My love.

I don't have any pictures of him on my computer, so I can't share any with you at this time. I wish I would just get my computer working good so I could hook up my scanner, install the software and scan picture after picture of Baby Googie. It would something nice to do when I know it's a day of crying or a day of boredom or something where I Need a project.

*Sigh* It's a sad day. Six years doesn't make it any easier. At least he rests next to my computer, and everyone knows I spend too much time at this spot. But such is life. *Sigh*

I've said this before, death makes you value your living loved ones. Today, I made Maxine feel special. I made sure Tierna felt loved. I wanted to make sure they know how I feel about them every chance I get. I know my temper gets the best of me many times and Maxine gets yelled at just for being a curious cat. I feel bad afterwards, and there is no way of taking it back. So, learn from it Carisa. Learn from it.

I'm listening to music as I'm writing, which is the first time I've done that this year (at the very least). I needed to distract myself. I watched the Survivor 4 Season Finale tonight, which made me cry, but it wasn't for the reason I previously stated, so crying in that instance is okay, right? I'm going to have to agree with me because that's the only other person here. Oh my. I should just stop now.

Carisa